Sent: April 8/09 11:16 pm
Jess: I just took a shit that was so big it makes my asshole feel like something is missing.
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2009
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April
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- Stir the meat pot.
- Would Miranda criticize?
- Beefy.
- A mexican haiku.
- She gets "Wild Horses" and we both want "Tuesday's...
- "What goes with Busch Light? Hot dogs?"
- She's in it for the gang bang.
- Whore: noun 1. a woman who engages in promiscuous ...
- Everyone else is just hungover.
- Meat panties.
- Blitz day.
- Pass the mustard.
- Purely fact and chauvinism.
- At least Brittney indulges my obsession.
- If only Paul Rudd was here.
- It was the worst of times.
- Coleman beef.
- Fuck non-kosher for Passover Pepsi.
- It's as close to heaven as you're going to get!
- There's no point in even texting this.
- Schitty Chinese.
- "Never a Tender Moment."
- It's not a finger.
- "And tonight's powerball number is..."
- What's your ghetto name?
- I'm just coming to bang you.
- I take the present opportunity of answering your l...
- Amen, sister friend.
- A rant.
- It'll all be over soon.
- Christ has come.
- This pretty much sums up our friendship.
- Wicked awesome.
- Love and death, sort of.
- Jeff Goldbloom.
- Post post-modern light installation.
- One large with black olives and tampax.
- If only.
- Job search.
- Tell me a story.
- Fighting obesity.
- Jess has IBS.
- Tru luv.
- WoW.
- This text has been compromised.
- Birthday wishes from Terin's mom.
- Random thoughts by Chad.
- Thank God, Allah, Vishnu, and Harry Potter for bul...
- The Online Diary of Anne Frank
- Are you there, God? It's me, Margaret.
- Floral patterns and loafers in your future.
- I have a UTI, WTF.
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April
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